Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Fifth Log: Antidote

His breathing was heavy. He was heavy.

I have to stop somewhere and apply first aid. Or else… He will die.

No wait! What am I doing? Isn’t it my primary mission to eliminate this being?

If I do that, I will rise up in my ranks. I will be eligible to lead the whole clan. And I would have the power over all…

Still…

He is so young. In mind and in body.

It is against our law to kill the innocent unless it is necessary.

He is innocent. Does that mean it is against our rules to kill him?

But it is my mission. Does that mean that I should just let him die?



I stopped at the rooftop of one of the lodging houses near the train station to check on his vital signs.

Not good!

His lips had already turned blue. His breathing remained heavy and he was breaking in cold sweat. The poison was definitely spreading fast!

I didn’t think twice on what I was about to do.

Forget the clan! Forget the mission! I cannot let this person die!

I carefully laid him down with his head on my lap. I need him to stay awake so I slapped his face with the back of my hand. He groaned. Good. He is still conscious.

“Hey. You. Wake up. Don’t sleep!”

He groaned again as he tried to nod. “Don’t move, alright? You’ve been poisoned. If you move, the poison would just spread further. I have an antidote right here. It wouldn’t taste good, but it would make you feel better.”

He was breathing in huge gasps now and was mumbling meaningless incoherent words.

“B-bontakun… N-no… No m-more mushrooms… I-I promise, Mama… No… please… not Bontakun…”

He is getting delirious! I have to hurry!

I realized that he was too weak to administer the antidote by himself the moment I found the small flask and opened it. There is only one way left.

I quickly pulled off the black mask that covered the lower half of my face and put the antidote into my mouth. Slowly and carefully, I raised his head as I lowered mine until our lips met. Upon contact, I released the antidote into his mouth, hoping that he would be able to drink it all.

When I lowered his head back into my lap, I was not sure if I succeeded. He was lying very still and unresponsive.

“Shinji!” I yelled. “Shinji! Do you hear me? Shinji! Wake up! Don’t die!” I began to beat his chest with my arm. “Shinji! Wake up! Shinji!”

But he remained unresponsive.

No... Did I... I... failed?

No!

~Yumi Takai